stop my beating heart

Some may say happiness comes from many sources. A warm weather day when it should be cold. Surprise guava juice when you return home from a long trip. Sitting on Ke’e beach watching the sunset with a background of wild chickens and the lapping of water. Maybe an amazing concert, a once in a lifetime job opportunity (this could be my big break), a dryer warmed blanket with mint cocoa, drive ins, sleepovers on trampolines, new computers, pants that trick you. Space. Saturn through a telescope. Stars. The moon.

I would say, yes please….but……

Sitting in a delivery room anticipating the second life never will never be the same again, wondering, asking, waiting, waiting, waiting and then……. crying. looking. straining. holding. Without another thought in your mind. You love him, and everything else is just a bonus.

I’m not even talking about my OWN child. Made an aunt 4 times over, with the birth of my 2nd nephew yesterday….I am scared thinking that when I actually give birth to a child of my own fireworks, shooting stars and marching bands may burst out of my heart cavity.

Here’s to Tristan (and wright and steph). I love you. Thanks for making my heart so full.

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10 thoughts on “stop my beating heart

  1. you will definitely have sparks flying when you give birth. Actually you may have streamers coming out! ha ha! i am laughing so hard at myself!! but i love you and am sorry i missed you on friday. I was in Bountiful and didnt get home til 1am. So Sorry!! when do you come back? have you left? call me if you havent! i love you!!! WHIT

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  2. I needed a little “Rachel pics” this morning and never to disappoint you made me smile. Congratulations to Wright and Steph. There kids are beautiful. I love you Rach!

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  3. o’ no….. he is too beautiful!!! and you are one talented lady. i need to get pregnant so you can come and take images like this for me. i love them rach, and love you more !!!

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  4. I think I may love him too! What a handsome little guy. Congrats Wright and Steph. And Rach, I can’t wait to see you as a new mommy one day! Ooohhhh… your babies will be breathtaking! LOVE YUNS, Trina

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  5. Every time I see your photos of newborns… I just want you here to capture my own…. I hope I get to see you soon!

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  6. Rach, these are amazing. I love the lighting! You are such a great aunt, and Wright and Steph are so lucky to have you as their photographer! I regret not having you photograph my own boy’s births. Great job! Love ya!

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  7. That’s a lovely sentiment, Thursty, but I don’t think those are fireworks. And I don’t think they come shooting out of your heart, exactly…

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  8. …maybe I got confused…doesn’t something shoot out of somewhere? I also heard it’s worse going to the dentist, is this true? 🙂

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  9. You captured the moment. Makes me want to have another baby! Congratulations to Wright and Stephanie, too. I love you, Rachel. Peggy

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